Family.

"What is family? They were the people who claimed you. In good, in bad, in parts or in whole, they were the ones who showed up, who stayed there, regardless. It wasn't just about blood relations or shared chromosomes, but something wider, bigger. We have many families over time: our family of origin, the family we created, as well as the groups you moved through while all of this was happening: friends, lovers, sometimes even strangers. None of them were perfect, and we couldn't expect them to be. You couldn't make any one person your world. The trick was to take what each could give you and build a world from it."- Sarah Dessen

I read that quote awhile back when I read her book, Lock and Key and this weekend I was reminded of these specific words. When they came to my mind, I opened the book and found those lines and read them through over and over again. After doing so, I asked myself: "What is family, to me?" It was more than just a group of people I was born into. They were the people who we grow up learning from, the people whose genes are a part of our very own blue print. Chances are, most characteristics and things that make us who we are can be traced back to our parents and how they raised us and how they were raised. Growing up, I learned something different from each of my family members. From my Mom, I learned to give. She is a woman of God who gives with all of her heart, with no strings attached and no expectations for anything in return. From my dad, I learned strength and patience. He is the most knowledgeable, strong, and patient man I know in this entire world, he always, regardless of the circumstances, stayed strong and stayed loving and patient. From my Sister Ashley, I learned to follow my heart. She has always had the Independence and courage to do whatever she wanted, she took leaps of faith and did whatever it took to make her happy, she always took life into her own hands. From my brother Josh, I learned to always stand tall. He has always had a good head on his shoulders, and always has the ability to separate logic and emotion, and how to communicate both of those things. And lastly, my youngest brother Bradley who has taught me compassion. I have never seen or experienced a heart as big as his, who loves and cares deeply about those around him.

You see, although I only talked about a few things each person has taught me... They each have taught me something significantly different. I have been able to take what they had to offer, and turn it into who I am today. Families have trials, they have rough patches, they annoy you, get on your nerves... sometimes you don't know how you came from them.... but regardless of how you feel about your family, they are just that... your family. They were there the day you were born and they will be the ones sitting in the front row at our funerals. God HAND PICKED our families for us, for some reason these people that were born in, married into our families, are there for a reason. We may not ever be able to understand it, we may not always like it... but it is our job to trust that God knows what he is doing, and he knew what he was doing when he mapped out our lives and the people we would spend them with.

I pray that whoever you are, wherever you are... that you take a step back from the issues, the problems, the brokeness, the stubborness... whatever it is, and just thank God for the people he supplied you with. The people that have always loved you, regardless of the decisions or choices you have made. I encourage you to look at what these people can teach you, what they can do to help you be a better person... I encourage you to find the good in those around you, because its there... we are just so blinded by the factors of our fallen world, that we forget that Jesus saw the good in even the worst... the prostitutes, the liars, the cheats, the broken...

Romans 8: 38-39 says, "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present or the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to seperate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Love as Jesus loved, be a follower of a God who is LOVE.

The Best Love

It's that time of the year when school is wrapping up and summer is creeping closer and closer. I am finishing up my second year at California State University of San Marcos, and it has gone by much quicker than I imagined it would. Although I am usually the kind of person to make a plan and follow through with it... College has been different. I found myself starting out as a liberal studies major, studying to become a teacher one day... But then after two semesters, I changed my major to business to become a part of my family's business that my grandfather started. After only one semester I realized how unhappy I was with my decision. I wanted more than anything to be apart of the business and make a difference there... But I knew in my heart that this business degree would make me unhappy. So now I have changed yet again... I am now a Marketing and Communications major full time, and in the near future I will be taking classes for product design for the business and I am SO happy with my decision. But in order to move on to this next semester, I have to get through this one which is only about 3 more weeks. All the stress and busyness has seemed to be getting to me. I find myself more stressed and more tired than normal, I couldnt be more ready for Summer. Part of me wants to just hop in my car and drive... Without a plan and without a worry. I've found that lately, driving has been my getaway... It always has been, driving and writing. It seems to me that I always think the best when I'm driving and I always put to words in my writing what is going on in my head and my heart. That's how my Grandpa Jack is... He writes for a living now, and he expresses his heart throughout all his books. One thing that always stood out to me about my grandfather and his writing, was his love for my Grandmother. My Grandma Fran was a wonderful woman. Her smile had the ability to lighten any mood and her hospitality always warmed people's hearts... I have always wanted to be like her, I have always strived for the qualities that she displayed here on earth, even through her sickness. And above all, I have always strived for the love between her and my grandfather. I don't think i have ever seen a love so strong and so inspiring. So strong in fact, that it still lives on to this day...years after her passing away from my Grandpa. He still cries when he speaks of her, and still misses her more and more every day. 60 years they were together... And he still loves her with all his heart. They made marriage look easy, they made it look like it was a blissful breeze. Oh how they have impacted my life and my heart. I only pray that I can strive for a marriage like that... That even through the stubbornness of each other, the hard times, the trials, the bad days, and the disagreements... That there will always be a fire in each heart that burns for the other. That after decades of being together, the love has only bonded them closer together. My Grandparents are my heroes and my inspiration... I love my Grandpa, and I miss my grandma more than anything. In closing, I look back at a memory of my grandma after she had gotten sick and no longer remembered who I was. Every moment I looked at her, she smiled. She smiled from her heart and displayed true contentment even through her sickness. Her laugh and her smile brought a warmth to anyone's heart... I still remember her smile, and I cherish it in my heart hoping to never forget it. Nicholas Sparks said it best when he wrote, "The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds." I'm sure when he wrote that he meant it to be for two human beings... But I read it and think about Jesus, and the love he has for us and how his love has the ability to plant a fire in our hearts and bring peace to our minds.

Independently Dependent

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God…will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus… And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.” Reading from Philippians 4, these verses specifically stood out to me after my devotional today. After I read through both of my devotionals, I thought about the difference in two people: independent and dependant.

An independent person, someone who is free from the influence, guidance, or control of another or others… someone who is self-reliant. This kind of person is someone who doesn’t always need others, who can rely on themselves rather than looking to others for affirmation or help.

A dependent person is just the opposite. Someone who relies on another or others for support or for guidance. Some might say, these are the lovers of the world… the ones who just cannot bear to be alone.

When these two different personalities came to my mind, I examined myself and found that naturally I am a dependent person. I enjoy the presence of other people and quality time with people one on one. I love giving advice, and I love receiving advice. When I make decisions about my life, most of the time it is after I have talked to someone close in my life for guidance. But then I looked at other close people in my life and found that I had a variety of friends both independent and dependent. Neither of which was bad, just different. But then I thought about my relationship with God, did it reflect my personality or was it the opposite?

God has designed us to need him in every moment of everyday, he created us not be self-sufficient and independent but to have a constant reliance on him. He wants us to be aware of our inability to get through life alone and recognize that he can meet each and every need that is in accordance with his plan, and it does not drain him or his resources at all. My devotional related our relationships with God to our relationships here on earth… If I were to only have a short conversation with Cory once or maybe twice a day, or just go days maybe even weeks without spending quality time with him… our relationship would fall to pieces. If I expected our relationship to be easy and not have to do any work, it would not function… as it is the same with our relationships with Jesus Christ. It takes quality time, conversation, trust, faith, forgiveness, grace, and understanding… All of the same bases of foundation needed for our relationships in our own lives. But why should we be surprised that our relationships with others should reflect our relationship with God? God calls us to love others, that when we love our brother or our enemy, we are loving God. GOD is love… Every form of love was created by God, for us to love God and love others, to build relationships with people and our relationship with God.

God is always there, always waiting for us... always loving us. It is US that has to make the decision to love him in return, to serve him in return... It's all on us, to be independently dependent on our Father and to have a relationship built on the same values and respect as any other relationship.