This semester has been a whirlwind for me. Seventeen units for school, working 20+ hours a week, leading a growth group, and attempting to have free time has left me tired and stressed. I enjoy busy-ness for the most part, don't get me wrong I love my lazy days where I do nothing, but overall I love being productive and busy. But this wasn't busy, this was overdoing it. I began to forget what was important and was no longer prioritizing my life according to God... until he began reminding me. It didn't take long before I heard him. Every sermon, every growth group, every devotional, every bible passage... everything was reminding me of how busy-ness can be a sin. And one night at the Jordan, I finally just broke down towards the end of the service on, you bet--busy-ness. The overloading of plans the past few months had left me drained and filled with emotion and I was no longer going to let Satan bring me down to believe that this was a good way to live. My sister reminded me of a quote, "If you are too busy to spend time with God and in the Word, then you are too busy than God intended you to be."And finally, I am learning to slow down. God gives us twenty four hours in a day for a reason, because we cannot handle more than that. My body cannot physically and mentally handle more than those twenty four hours at a time, most of those hours which I need to sleep.
I am at a time in my life where there is change, both on the leaves of trees and in every one of my days. I'm finally pursuing a major I enjoy, I'm enjoying my job, I am in love with leading a growth group, and I am loving my relationships in my life both with God, my family, and Cory. Every day I learn a little more about Cory and about our relationship. Every day I find another reason to prove that we are meant to be together and that God especially planned for us to meet at the time we did. He is a continual blessing in my life and constant support...and that boy would do anything for me.
John Steinbeck once wrote, "Change comes like a little wind that ruffles the curtains at dawn, and comes like the stealthy perfume of wildflowers hidden in the grass." I didn't take note of the change in my life until driving through Julian yesterday, seeing the changing of the leaves. A year ago, I was so lost and I had no clue where God wanted me. Now that I've opened myself to opportunity, he has been changing me from the inside out. And just like the colorful, changing leaves on those trees... I'm changing and falling in love with who God has made me.
